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Messy Perfect

Audiobook
0 of 1 copy available
Wait time: About 6 weeks
0 of 1 copy available
Wait time: About 6 weeks

Perfect for fans of Mason Deaver and Becky Albertalli, this tender, raucous novel follows a rule-following, perfectionist teen who starts an underground GSA club at her conservative Catholic high school, from the acclaimed author of Kings, Queens, and In-Betweens.

Cassie Perera is a star student in St. Luke's junior class. But the new school year brings an unwelcome surprise—the return to St. Luke's of Cassie's former friend, Ben, who left a few years ago after a homophobic bullying incident Cassie knows she didn't do enough to prevent.

Still harboring guilt from her inaction, Cassie decides, in her usual, overzealous way, to team up with the neighboring public school to found an underground Gender and Sexuality Alliance—as a complicated strategy for making things up to Ben. Secretly, Cassie is also tempted by the possibility of opening up about her own sexuality for the first time.

As Cassie's new friends urge her out of her comfort zone, she unlocks a kind of joy and freedom she's never felt before—even as she struggles to balance these experiences with her typical tightrope of being the perfect daughter, student, and Catholic.

Cassie's perfectly curated life unravels into turmoil, but can she embrace the mess enough to piece together something new?

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    • Kirkus

      February 15, 2025
      To support her former best friend at their Catholic high school, a closeted queer teen in Canada starts a club for LGBTQ+ students. Cassie Perera and Ben Yang were best friends until sixth grade when, in a moment of fear and panic and hoping to deflect the homophobic bullying of racist classmates at their Catholic school, Cassie betrayed Ben. They see each other for the first time in years at the start of 11th grade when Ben, back from the National Ballet School in Toronto, arrives at St. Luke's. Cassie is determined to atone for her actions. After Cassie meets the diverse members of a local public school's Gender and Sexuality Alliance, she decides that forming an underground partnership to create a safe space for queer kids at St. Luke's is the perfect way to show Ben that she's changed. But navigating school, church, her Sri Lankan immigrant parents' expectations, and the confusing mess of feelings for girls that she's tried to push away for years tests her anxious desire to be perfect. Fast-paced and heartfelt, Boteju's latest examines the intersection of queerness and Catholicism with nuance and compassion while demonstrating the need for safe spaces in schools so that kids can be themselves. A sweet, emotional read affirming those who struggle to find a place within religions that profess to hate who they are.(Fiction. 13-18)

      COPYRIGHT(2025) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

    • School Library Journal

      April 1, 2025

      Gr 7 Up-Boteju's latest queer coming-of-age story offers a vulnerable look into the intersection of identity and religion. Cassie Perera, a straight-A student and textbook overachiever, has a secret: she's a lesbian. She's known since she outed her childhood best friend, Ben, and threw him under the bus to hide her own identity. And now that Ben has moved back? She must find a way to make it up to him and repair their friendship. After a chance encounter with another school's Gender & Sexuality Alliance (GSA), and their beautiful coleader Halle, Cassie thinks she's found just the way to do it. Cassie's internal struggle to embrace both her religion, which she loves, and her identity, which she wants to stop denying, is genuine and heartbreaking. Her fear of being rejected for parts of her that she can hide but not change, juxtaposed with the freedom and self-expression she finds among her new friends, artfully articulates the beauty of community. The supporting characters, Halle, Ben, and other members of their underground group, help show the lived experiences of LGBTQIA+ teens as anything but monolithic. VERDICT Cassie's eventual confrontation with the various parts of her life and the impact of her decisions make this book the perfect addition to any well-rounded YA collection.-Jolie Hanlon

      Copyright 2025 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

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