If Only

May 1, 2018

Gr 9 Up-Bridget is a pregnant 16-year-old rapidly running out of time to decide what the future will look like-for her and for her unborn baby girl. Sixteen years later, that baby, Ivy, is happily living with her loving adoptive moms but becoming increasingly determined to make contact with her birth mother. Sprinkled throughout are "if only" vignettes-which envision a variety of possible futures for Bridget or Ivy-and are often confusing enough to pull readers out of the narrative's flow, especially early on in the novel. It's clear that Gilmore, an adoptive mother herself, is passionate about the topic and interested in exploring the emotional facets of the adoption process from the perspectives of all parties involved, but the novel suffers from an extremely narrow focus, with everything revolving around the adoption. Neither Bridget nor Ivy are well developed-they have no real personalities or variety in story arcs, and little-to-no interaction with the novel's few secondary characters. However, because the teen years are a time of intense curiosity and identity formation, this laser focus is not entirely unbelievable. Half of the book is written from the perspective of the birth mother-a viewpoint not usually covered in fiction with adopted characters. VERDICT Despite its literary shortcomings, this title would be a good addition to YA collections.-Ann Santori, Cook Memorial Public Library, Libertyville, IL

Copyright 2018 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

May 14, 2018
Gilmore (We Were Never Here) explores how one decision can change the course of multiple lives in this lyrical, heartfelt novel that alternates between the perspectives of a pregnant teen and her child 16 years later. In 2000, Bridget is faced with the impossible mission of picking the perfect adoptive parents for her unborn daughter. But how can she know if she’s making the right choice when she wants so badly to keep her baby? In 2017, her daughter Ivy knows little about her birth mother and is eager to meet her face-to-face, but although the adoption was supposed to be open, no one has heard a word from Bridget in years. Sandwiched between Ivy’s quest to find Bridget and Bridget’s ordeal interviewing prospective parents, chapters show what might have happened if Ivy had been adopted by different couples or raised by her biological mother. Although the alternate possibilities may initially cause some confusion, ideas regarding the butterfly effect (“My life exists because of a swish of that butterfly’s wing,” Ivy speculates. “I could be anywhere. I could be anyone. Am I the best me possible?”) will likely inspire readers to stretch their imaginations. Ages 14–up. Agent: Jennifer Joel, Curtis Brown.

Starred review from May 1, 2018
A probing look at teen pregnancy and adoption.Acclaimed novelist Gilmore (We Were Never Here, 2016, etc.) explores the loaded subject of adoption from multiple perspectives. She fashions two first-person narratives: Bridget, a pregnant 16-year-old grappling with whether to keep her baby at the turn of the 21st century, and Ivy, a 16-year-old adoptee, who in 2017 decides the time to find her birth mother has come. Early on, Gilmore slowly reveals that Ivy is the daughter Bridget gave to lesbian couple Andrea and Joanne in 2000, exiting their lives shortly thereafter, leaving only letters for Ivy. While the intricately interwoven nonlinear narrative offers much food for thought in terms of identity formation and reflects a concerted effort to present characters from a variety of diverse backgrounds, the novel excels in diving head-on into the deep moral and existential quandaries unplanned pregnancy and adoption present. On the one hand, Bridget expresses the view that "adoption is always the story of someone breaking someone else's heart," just as Ivy tries to reconcile feeling fortunate--"I am the prize. I have never not felt that way."--with wondering "Why did she hand me over in the end? What did I do that was so bad?" Bridget and Ivy are white.Gilmore's gritty multigenerational tale not only seeks to ask adoption's toughest questions, but dares to offer no easy answers: Not to be missed. (Fiction. 14-adult)

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June 1, 2018
Grades 9-12 This book, which is somewhat experimental in format, alternates between Bridget and Ivy. In 2000, 16-year-old Bridget is pregnant and searching for the perfect parents for her daughter. In 2017, Ivy, also 16, is on a similar hunt for her birth mother. The connection between the two young women is no secret, yet Gilmore injects freshness into her narrative with a third type of chapter: the different possible paths their lives could take. The function of these If Only chapters is not immediately obvious, but it certainly adds a unique element to this quiet novel. Distinctly poetic in quality, Gilmore's prose and dialogue flows easily and naturally. Bridget's and Ivy's voices are extremely similar, but this serves to highlight the relationship between the two young women. Gilmore explores different aspects of adoption deftly and with empathy. The novel ends on a cliff-hanger, but one that emphasizes the two girls' realistic, deeply personal journeys rather than the destinations.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2018, American Library Association.)

January 1, 2019
Introspective narration alternates between that of pregnant sixteen-year-old Ivy, choosing adoptive parents for her baby in 2017, and the parallel story of her own mother, Bridget, sixteen years prior. Readers who carefully follow the nonlinear narrative will find an original and thoughtful lens through which to examine teenage pregnancy and adoption.

(Copyright 2019 by The Horn Book, Incorporated, Boston. All rights reserved.)